Would you rather?

Would you rather live in a beautiful place with cold, detached people or a cold place with beautiful, warm souls?

Would you rather be surrounded by those with bookish intelligence and no common sense, or those with rich life experiences and great people skills?

Would you rather talk to someone who is open or puts up walls?

Would you rather see honesty or saccharin sweet bullshit?

Would you rather rely on yourself or lean on the unreliable?

Would you rather feel like a sardine crammed into a can or dance to a different drum?

Would you rather see lots of weird and crazy shit while people watching, or yawn at their predictability?

Would you rather be a gem or the status quo?

Would you rather have it all figured out or would you rather wait to see if life pleasantly fucking surprises you?

Would you rather an exhilarating adrenalin rush or the security of monotony?

Would you rather listen less and speak more boldly, or listen wisely and open your mouth less?

Would you rather have a perfect body or a perfect mind?

Would you rather gasp for air or swallow absolute freedom?

Would you rather live to feel love, or love the feeling of living?

Would you rather fight back the tears of sadness or shed tears of joy?

Would you rather laugh till you're clutching your abs or fake it till you make it with a forced smile?

Would you rather judge by quality or quantity?

Would you rather experience compassion or apathy?

Would you rather throw in the cards or demonstrate fortitude?

Would you rather create profound, positive change in humanity that no one else notices or contribute something mediocre that gives you accolades and fame?

Would you rather be admired for who you are right now, or would you rather be placed on a pedestal for what you simply appear to be?

Would you rather be rich in relationships or would you rather be rolling in money?

Would you rather be a treasured memory or a forgotten existence?

Would you rather be comforted or the comforter?

Would you rather understand or would you rather seek to be understood?

Would you rather confront or avoid?

Would you rather be an open book or just a short nondescript chapter?

Would you rather push the envelope or would you rather blend in with the crowd?

Would you rather inspire people to think in a more helpful way or would you rather mentally shut them down with bullying tirades?

Would you rather feel lonely in a crowd or would you rather be alone at home?

Would you rather people talk to you only when things are going well or only when things are awful?

Would you rather be right or would you rather be kind?

Would you rather change yourself for the better or repeat the same redundant shit with no awareness and sense of personal responsibility?

Would you rather live in a world of choice or a world of self-induced oppression?

Would you rather someone who agrees with you or someone who argues and disagrees with you?

Would you rather me keep going or would you rather I stop with the Would You Rathers?

Various ponderings....

Over the course of the past week or two, there have been a few ideas marinating in my mind of things I wanted to write about soon. I felt like I had so much to say about these particular topics, and now it seems the juicy thoughts have disintegrated. If only I had more mental energy to blog after a hard day's work, days when these thoughts have flooded my brain. :( I even jotted them down on scratch paper. Now I can hardly remember what I wanted to say about all three topics, extensively anyway. Sigh. Perhaps instead, I can still briefly write about them and pose this more as a forum....a survey of sorts to you readers. What are your thoughts? Comments, please.

1. I recently joined (yet another) dating website and while I feel generally pessimistic about online dating, I was trying to put my best profile forward so to speak. See, I have this problem with talking about myself. I'm not good at it. I don't know how to capture a true representation of "Katie" in a rinky dinky About Me box. It's a numbers game; too bad I've always sucked at math. I originally had written something boring (unintentionally of course), got annoyed with myself, and enlisted the help of my best friend. I had him look at it and bust out the proverbial red pen with suggestions on what to modify. It's funny how changing what you write can attract a different "audience" of who is interested in you. I went from Geekville (in a bad way) to Jockville (also bad). With profile #1 I attracted men who may have had a brain, but no social skills and no physical attractiveness. With profile #2, I seem to attract men who are pretty attractive but are lacking a sense of humor and not enough brains to string a coherent, grammatically correct sentence together. So what I wonder my readers, is it even humanly possible to say the perfect thing in that damn About Me box to attract a match who is at least 80-85% of what you're seeking in the dating/relationship world?

2. I recently had a therapy session with a client and the topic of BDSM (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/BDSM) came up, as my client told me she used to engage in this sexual activity in the past. I explored this more with her, specifically the safety of the practice and the emotions that come up for her when she has done this. Interestingly, she talked about how it allows her to cry without guilt or shame (because the message she received growing up was that she looked "ugly" when she cried). As I listened, I was completely fascinated and reminded of the thin line between pleasure and pain. Sure, there are more conventional methods to healing through emotional pain...but who am I to judge that BDSM may in some way be helping this woman heal? I can't say it's "good," nor can I say it's "bad." My perspective on issues is almost always in the grey. This is what I love about my job. It stretches my mind to think beyond the status quo, beyond the dictates of "normal." Honestly, I don't know anything in depth about this form of sexual behavior....and now I'm tempted to learn more just for the sake of knowledge. What are your thoughts on BDSM? Does it seem bizarre? Is it just an unorthodox sexual behavior? Does it have the potential to heal powerful emotional "wounds" stored in the body?

3. I am extremely curious to ask my Dad about this one: This particular subject I got to thinking about comes from a therapy session with another one of my clients. Due to confidentiality, I cannot go into details of what exactly happened. All I can say is that it involved the issue of tazing by law enforcement. A few years ago, media sensationalized the practice with the "Don't tase me bro!" slogan. It became a cultural joke. Tazing, however, appears quite disturbing and inhumane in my eyes. I don't know much about it yet, but I am learning about it now and intend to ask my dad (a cop) how acceptable it is for an officer to use this as a weapon when they're on duty, how often it is abused by law enforcement, and WHY it's even used in the first place (to me it seems like it causes more harm than "good"). Maybe when I research this topic more (by "interviewing" my dad for instance), I will blog more extensively on the subject. How much do you know about tazing? Thoughts? Comments?