"Goonies never say die": Adventures in Oregon

I recently told my friend Ricky (who is visiting from out of town) that I would be off for three days in a row this week and spontaneously came up with the idea to check out some hot spots in Oregon, if he was up for it. He was, and off we went.

We left Monday morning in his rental car, with "G.G." (the name of his lovely GPS navigator) in tow. We had a rough idea of some places we wanted to check out, but nothing set in stone. It was an absolutely beautiful day; we couldn't have asked for better weather. Sunny sky with temperatures in the slight 70's, no humidity! After arriving in Portland a little after 1:00, we headed to the Portland Zoo. Ricky had wanted to go there because he had heard it's supposedly awesome.

In retrospect, it certainly wasn't all it was cracked up to be...at least we didn't think so. It was ok, but definitely not a photography lover's dream. Trees engulf a majority of the zoo, which gives the feeling one is walking through a pseudo-rainforest. Very soothing to walk through (minus the endless crowds of overactive young children swarming us, on a summer camp field trip I am guessing) and the shade from the trees conducive to hot and humid days. For taking pictures though, not so much. In addition to the trees creating a mostly dark atmosphere, most animals were behind glass windows and/or behind metal wirings of some sort. I took lots of photos, but was not satisfied with the quality of most of them. We also wondered if the animals were doped up on some drugs because most of them were napping or on their way to naptime. Ricky: "I want some ACTIVE animals!" In the rare instances an animal was actually standing or 'active' in the slightest way, they were usually mooning us. There are only so many pictures one can take of an animal's ass! Needless to say, the zoo wasn't particularly the top highlight of our Oregon adventures. Oh well.

After the zoo debacle, we checked in to the nearby Holiday Inn to drop our shit off before heading out for a late lunch. I had a craving for some suburban restaurant food. Olive Garden in Beaverton, Oregon won the grand prize. I must say we had overly friendly and attentive waitresses/servers during our two day Oregon trip, probably the most friendly waitresses I've had at a restaurant. I think Oregon is my new favorite state. Anyway, getting back to what I was saying. Having seen that we were the poster children for tourists (me in my "I Heart New York" tshirt, ironic cause I've never actually been to New York....and Ricky with his multiple Oregon brochures splayed in front of him on the table), the waitress is nosy and starts asking us questions. We chat with her off and on, usually her catching us in mid forkful of food with her curious questions. She was very perky indeed and gave us some more possible ideas of places to check out.

Towards the end of our meal, my phone rings. It's a local number; I don't answer. Minutes later, I check my message. It's a lady from a women's treatment program, wanting to know if I'd be interested to set up an interview with her for this Thursday afternoon. I save the message and decide to call her tomorrow. Not two minutes later, our waitress is delivering some food to the party of six or seven behind our table. I'm not one to typically eavesdrop on conversations, but it was the strangest thing. I didn't hear anything else and yet I heard her say "I have a degree in Substance Abuse Counseling." My ears perked up. I cannot escape themes of substance abuse, even while on vacation! I thought it was funny, the irony.

As she turned around to walk away from the table and walk past our table, I stopped her. "Did I just hear you say you have a degree in Substance Abuse Counseling?!" My ears did not deceive me; it was true. She went on to tell me that for two years, she was prescribed to take Xanax for horrible panic/anxiety problems and that she remembers hardly anything from that time of her life (meaning, she got hooked on it). She went on to rebuild her life, adding "It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do." I assume this is what made her decide to pursue her degree, to give back to others. While it seems to be something she is passionate about, she went on to say that she makes more money working at Olive Garden ("I believe it" I tell her) and that counselors should be paid more money since they're the ones helping all these troubled people. I couldn't stop shaking my head in absolute agreement.....

Next stop: Portland's highly acclaimed Japanese Garden. This turned out to be my favorite place in Portland. Even the pictures I took don't do it justice. This place is as close as it gets to the real thing. It's like stepping into a different realm of existence, representing the epitome of 'zen,' 'peace,' and simplistic 'beauty.' Japanese architecture, waterfalls, flowers, bamboo shoots with water dripping into small fountains, moss covered rocks, cool shaped steps and walking paths, rocks in sand. Simply amazing and relaxing.

We then walked across the street to the Rose Test Garden. The smells emanating in the air as we walked in couldn't even fit in a single bottle of the most floral of perfumes. Another photographer's paradise. Unfortunately, my digital camera died after taking just one photo there. I was upset, but thought maybe the gods were trying to tell me that this was literally the time for me to 'Stop and smell the roses." So I did. Plus, I can snatch some of Ricky's photos later. :)

We went back to the hotel to call it a night. I had a margarita in the bar area of the hotel, though it tasted more like seltzer water with a pinch of lime and tequila. Hmmm, I don't know.....

End of day 1. I sleep like a rock on the heavenly Holiday Inn bed. Ahhh.

Tuesday, June 17 2008
I wake up to the sound of an airplane or helicopter. With the drapes closed, it is very dark in the room. I have no sense of time and think it must be late in the morning. It's only 7:15am! But I'm awake and unpredictably excited, so I hop out of bed and take a shower, pack my bag, and am ready to go! Ricky wakes up around 8:30, wondering why I didn't wake him up; I didn't want to be a Travel Nazi. After grabbing some breakfast and coffee for the road, we head towards our next destination: Astoria, Oregon. I'm stoked because this is the place where parts of "The Goonies" was filmed.

Ricky searches for a travel route on "G.G." and she tells us Astoria is about 75 miles away. We're guided along a very green, scenic route that reminds me of a cross between parts of Georgia (with blueberry farm/patches) and parts of Michigan (from my birthday trip in December). On the last 30 or 40 miles of our journey on this desolate, winding country road though.....the little gas icon lights up, indicating that there's a fourth of a tank left. GG tells us that the nearest gas station is 15 miles away, but when we head in the direction of where she claims there is a gas station, it takes us down a dead end dirt road. I'm getting a little nervous. We have no bars on our cell phones. In my mind, I'm already strategizing what the hell we would do if the car were to suddenly stop. I tell Ricky I've already been with two friends whose car ran out of gas (1. Year 2000: Nicole's car in San Marcos, Tx and 2. Year 2004: Kris' car in front of Melrose restaurant on Broadway in my Chicago neighborhood). "I don't want you to be the third," I tell him.

"Oh, just think of the blog you could write...." Ricky says.
I'm not that hard up for blog material, am I?

At mile marker 23 or thereabouts, we come upon an older gentleman road worker. Ricky rolls the window down and asks how far to the nearest gas station. Right around marker number 10. Hope we can make it. Surprisingly, we managed to endure the anxiety with a mutual sense of humor considering. I continued to play DJ with an 80's cd. Listened to a minute or two of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" and then I decided,

"Perhaps this isn't the best song to be listening to right now..."

"I was just thinking the same thing."

Of course, neither was "Smooth Criminal," but I liked the song too much to skip that as well. I took my chances with our gas crisis fate.

We started counting down the mile markers. It gave us an unexplainable sense of motivation and hope that we would outfox the vehicle. Fortunately, we glided into the old country gas station with body parts and dignity still intact. After we pull out of the station with a FULL tank of gas, Ricky tells me the lady working there told him alot of people that come to her gas station are in nervous mode by the time they find this godsent of a gas station. Like I said: middle of nowhere folks.

It's too bad we couldn't have stopped along that journey because it truly was beautiful, ideal for taking pictures.

Nearing the end of our journey by this point, we finally arrive in Astoria around noon. Walked around, took a few pictures, and had lunch at a seafood restaurant along the water. The weather was teetering on slightly crappy to borderline nice. At this point, I figured the day couldn't go downhill after the gas scare. Thankfully, I was right. :)

Again, we had a delightful waitress: full of smiles and great touristy suggestions. I had a tasty clam chowder breadbowl. It wasn't as thick as New England Clam Chowder, though it was still creamy. I had to wonder, does Oregon have their own characteristic version of clam chowder?

Our waitress gave us a plethora of exciting options. "The Goonies" was apparently filmed in various locations, the house being just up the street near/just past 39th. We never did find this on our trip back, but I'm sure it's up there somewhere. We told her we wanted to check out the coast and inquired as to where the end shot was filmed. Good thing we asked; we never would have found out on our own. FYI to all you Goonies enthusiasts: Cannon Beach. And it rocks. But more on that in a minute. With her help, we narrowed our to-do itinerary to the following places:

1. The Astoria column (which is historically significant, as part of the Lewis and Clark expedition,etc). We drove up there and snapped a few pictures, a view overlooking Astoria.

2. Cape Disappointment Lighthouse. We wondered what would motivate one to see something with the word 'disappointment' in it, yet I was driven by the quest to get a picture of a lighthouse. Ricky bragged about having great lighthouse photos from the coast of Maine (yes, I'm jealous). He took pity on me since I had none and thus, we headed to Cape Disappointment. Went on an awesome hike there. Very lush with lots of trees. We also came upon this little island called the Dead Man's Cove. Climbed down there and hung out for a bit. It reminded me of an island you'd see on "Lost" or similar such survivor type islands. I enjoyed this spot immensely. Took lots of pictures.

We continued on our hike to Cape Disappointment. Let's just say it lives up to its name, a very stark contrast to its lighthouse cousins on the East coast. It was smaller than I thought. Dilapidated with white paint that had been chipped away, it was obvious mother nature did not favor this shitty lighthouse either. We made our way back to our starting point, out of breath and sweaty from our great, arduous hike.

3. Cannon Beach
Next to the Japanese Garden, this was our other favorite place. Now I know why people rave about the Oregon Coast. Wow. An hour or two away from Astoria, Cannon Beach is awe inspiring. My photos didn't fully capture the magical magnificence of this place either. I still snapped away though. There was some kind of reception going on at the Ecola State Park (which is part of Cannon Beach) when we arrived, probably a wedding reception. Note to self: Remember this place when I am looking for a spot to get married someday!

We ended up finding this dirt path trail. Feeling adventurous, we veered off onto the path with a curiosity of where it would take us. It was definitely a hiking road less traveled. If it wasn't for the carved out dirt trail, one never would have guessed it was a hiking area. We had to push past tall patches of grass/nature and a few minutes later, came upon a steep section that descented to the bottom of the beach/rocks (I'm guessing about 40 to 60 feet below us). Ricky spotted a cave. We wondered if this was THE cave where the Goonies came out of, victorious and richer. Ricky was itching to go down there. He was feeling crazy and I was feeling cautious. While it seemed risky and fun, the reality was that I was wearing cheap Payless sneakers with no traction. I trust myself and nature when it comes to adventure hikes, but not Payless. I encouraged him to go for it. Meanwhile, I sat my ass down on the steep hill where I had stopped with my hike, and documented his crazy descent. I told him his ass better make it back up, because I didn't have my phone with me and there wasn't a human being in sight (for the second time, in our quest for adventure on this trip). I didn't want to end up as an example of nature experience gone awry in one of those survivor/in the wild books. My imagination was in overdrive again. So what do I do? Click away with my camera. I obviously wasn't that panic stricken. It would be just like me though to die careening off a cliff that I didn't even have the audacity to conquer due to lack of shoe preparation. But, "Goonies never say die."



Ricky ended up sliding down half of the way down and made it back up a few minutes later, still alive! I swear I saw a small gray creature scurry past five feet away from me. Thankfully, whatever it was stayed hidden while I attempted my way back. I had to jump from the hill I was chilling out at onto the more even patch of dirt. This was the only moment I was truly nervous, because Ricky wasn't there to grab my hand as a balance during this jump and one slight wrong move, I'd be sliding down that same steep spot down to the bottom NOT by choice. Seeing as I'm writing this, that was not the case. I felt a slight triumph and we made our way back to the car. This marked a momentous ending to the Oregon turned Goonies adventures.