"Friending"

I thought I was the only one who had these thoughts and feelings, but as it turns out I'm not. My mom didn't even know I was going to write about this today when I was hanging out with her earlier this afternoon. I laughed when she unknowingly mentioned the same thing to me.

What about you, dear reader? Have you ever crossed paths with a stranger that you were attracted to and wanted to ask out for a "friendship date?" I've had a handful of encounters with strangers lately that have stirred this feeling within me. I want to do the friend equivalent of dating: "friending."

It first started last month when I was on my way home from work. It was a rainy night. I'm pretty sure it was the same night I had to hospitalize a suicidal client because I didn't leave work till about 7:00. The windows on the bus were all fogged up and Young, Friendly Woman Reading A Book that I sat beside made a comment about not knowing exactly where her stop was coming up because the windows were foggy, thus it was hard for her to see. We exchanged a few pleasantries, including her revealing she also wasn't familiar with the area because she had just moved to the area. I perked up at hearing she was 'new.' I should have seized the moment and told her that I was a newbie too, but I think I was too tired and stressed out from my day at work to make the effort. She seemed nice and different from the typical "Seattle freeze" people I typically encounter though. For a split second, I wish I could befriend someone like her.

Coincidentally, I saw YFWRAB on my morning commute last Monday. It was an arduous journey that day, as various passengers commiserated about us being stuck in traffic because someone on the Aurora bridge was threatening to jump. There she was, dressed casually in jeans and talking on the phone. Whomever she was talking to was someone she was on her way to meet, as she told the person where she currently was on her commute. I wondered if she was on her way to some political activity, as she donned an Obama button and clutched a 'green' bag over her right shoulder. She stepped off the bus at a stop right before the Aurora bridge. Why do I keep running into this woman when suicidal situations are going on too? Is there a sign in all this?! As the bus took off and I looked at her through the window, I wished I could be friends with her. Why? I couldn't tell ya. She just seems...friendly, interesting, intelligent.

Then yesterday I interacted with a few men while doing errands who triggered the same feeling for me. I walked into Sip N' Ship to mail two books to a friend of mine. As I approached the counter, the guy working there was talking to a middle aged man. The way they were talking indicated they were friends, or at least acquaintances....making plans to do something later. Middle aged man leaves and I have Cute Postal Guy's full attention. He was very pleasant, asking me how my weekend was going and was very helpful in giving me the best bargain for my buck. Something about his personality gave me a yearning to be his friend too, and it wasn't just his looks because I think he might be gay.

An hour later, I'm in the checkout lane at the grocery store putting all my shit on the black assembly line conveyor belt. A thin, attractive man with slightly spiky hair who appeared to be in his early 30's pushed his cart behind me on register 6. There was 3 feet of space between where he and I had placed our collective items. Being ever the observer (and voyeur), I peeked at his vegetarian selections. He jokingly asked if I had enough room for my stuff and I played along with a witty repartee. Again, I was in "friending" mode. He followed me to the customer service desk....like me, to get a roll of quarters.

I'm going to invent a "Friending" bus route and/or shopping day, for those of us strictly seeking interesting people for friendship. It could be an easy and nonthreatening way to get to know someone that you really deep down just want to blurt out: "I really want to be your friend!"

"Friending." So innovative that I've just coined the term. And hopefully the concept.

Well, one can dream.