"I Remember..."

(An excerpt from one of my journals, June 2005....this was an exercise suggested in a creative writing book to help jog memories of your life)

I remember our annoying loud bird Fred (Dad was surprised I remember him and says I have a "good memory") and I remember biting into a small donut that turned out to be a rumball when I was 11 or 12---I spit it out! I remember talking on the phone with my grandmother and having to pee so bad by the time I was able to get off the phone with her because she liked to talk for so long!

I remember my first unofficial job at 15 at the Dairy Queen in North Carolina and turning the banana filled blizzard upside down and it spilling all over the counter because no one told me you can't turn the ones with bananas in them upside down (no thick consistency to hold it together). I remember feeling grateful that Mom took us away from Derry, New Hampshire (aka Hicktown, USA) to live in other places to give Alex and I perspective in life.

I remember helping Nicole push her car down the hill around the corner to the gas station when the car completely ran out of gas. I remember Nicole and I driving over to a cemetary in San Marcos after we watched the creepy "What Lies Beneath" at the movie theater. I remember Skip brushing his teeth every day after lunch when I worked at the computer lab in the Health building at SWT.

I remember giving a poem to Anita that I had written to put on her boyfriend Dave's car that he ended up liking very much. I remember getting pizza sauce on my dress when Dad took me to Papa Gino's when I was probably 5 or 6 in Derry and we didn't want Mom to find out because she'd be mad. I don't know if she did....

I remember Todd loving the poem I wrote about his daughter Brittney. I remember how boring of a date my "fantasy" high school crush was, how reality shattered the more intriguing illusion.

I remember speaking in front of everyone at my grandfather's funeral, but I can't remember what I said. I remember my former stepfather and I sitting at a table at Lake Travis in Austin discussing my fear that he would never talk to me again once he started his new life in England with Debbie (the woman he fucked on a kitchen table apparently) and how he said "that won't happen"....and it did.

I remember how excited and scared I felt when I was about to "drop" from the high in the air freefall ride at Great America last summer with the Rice crew. I remember Keith from Rice asking me if I thought he was "smart and handsome" and wanting to laugh at how he asked me such a question.

I remember reading the first book that changed my life when I was in my apartment on campus at SWT living with my first roomate Kim: "Man's Search for Meaning." I remember one of the few good dates I had was with Chris (church boy) that I worked with at Kroger---lunch at La Madeleine in Kingwood and good conversation. I also remember Christian (also from Kroger) talking about his toe fungus. Why? I guess he thought it would be a turn-on? Sadly mistaken.