It can be challenging enough to write about the taboo subject of those
who engage in the BDSM and swinger lifestyle, let alone write about it
from a perspective of self-discovery and intimate honesty. Suzy Spencer
blends and balances the two perfectly in "Secret Sex Lives: A Year on the Fringes of American Sexuality." In between the voyeuristic
sharing of her interviews, correspondence, and in person interactions
with her subjects, Suzy also courageously explores her own sexuality
with curious wonder.
What I most respected and loved about this
book wasn't what was said, but how she said it. Not once did I feel the
writing was contrived, patronizing, condemning, or even
glorifying....which I imagine is difficult not to do when writing about
taboo sexual practices. Suzy did not always agree with her subjects, nor
could she oftentimes relate to their practices...but she always
respected them and she turned something that could be construed as
stereotypically "dark" and "dirty" into a very humanistic desire:
Finding that sexual spark or passion that exists deep within human
beings, yearning to be ignited....to be authentically wanted, seen, and
known.
