Haunting of the Rats

Just looking at this picture as I type this blog gives me the creeps. I feel like this creature is going to jump out of the screen, right onto my desk....scavenging for cheese, yet finding nothing but Orbit gum and Bath and Body Works Sensual Amber Body Lotion for the taking. Or me for breakfast, yikes. So it turns out I'm not haunted by the "normal" things like everyday people. Watching John Carpenter's "Halloween" gets me a little on the edge of the couch. Standing or sitting near a crazy person on the CTA even makes me flinch a little, though usually more from stifling a chuckle from an entertainment standpoint. Seeing the occasional bug on the wall in my apartment ruffles my feathers a bit, but I calmly find a shoe with a firm sole or a very thick, padded paper product to squish it dead (so much for my pacifist ways) and I move on. No fear. Crisis averted. Gone. What doesn't seem to leave my thoughts or dreams lately? Rats. Lately, no matter where I turn, there they are: on the street or in my dreams (er, nightmares). What is up? About an hour before I had to wake up this morning, I was awakened by this frightening nightmarish scenario. Although not real, it still haunts me....especially when I look at this horrid rat photo. Why do I torture myself this way?

Apparently, I was on my way to work and it was dark outside (see how real it sounds? haha). Because it was still early in the morning, the neighborhood I was walking in was very desolate and quiet. I didn't see anyone or anything around me, except for the street I was walking on, stream-lined with apartment buildings as far as the eye could see. Wait, I see something else! First, he was scurrying along and then: he jumps thirty feet into the air towards me. Even though I was completely scared shitless, I recall thinking that it couldn't be possible that a rat could have that much jumping power/velocity...to jump so high and so far. I felt like I had stepped into a rat circus, but without a trapeze, rings of fire, or the obligatory decorated elephant with the bored look on his face. No, this was a circus out of the "Twilight Zone" or a Stephen King novel.

Luckily, I was able to dodge that first rat's jump. I look across the street and see him running through the gutters atop the connected apartment buildings, as if it was his takeoff platform for yes, another jump. Unfortunately, I am right. He makes another jump, this time right towards my face. Like something out of the "Matrix," at the exact moment the rat approached my face, my left hand quickly catches the smarmy vermin firmly like a baseball and throws it back with a fast and strong release. I didn't even have time to think about how nasty it felt to have groped the rat in my hand for those split two seconds. It was either that, or have the rat attack and chomp away at my face with his lethal teeth. I walk on and it's over...but is it?

I wake up and see that I have another hour to sleep before the alarm goes off. It's only a dream, but I was close to calling Carol for a ride this morning. I'm such a wimp when it comes to rats.