Twilight Zone?

The recurring theme of my thoughts this whole week: "Am I in the Twilight Zone?" It's been a strange week with people, personally and professionally. No matter how much I think I have a particular person figured out, they will do something to surprise me. This is especially true in regard to relationship dynamics. No matter how much I can logically remind myself that my connection with someone can both wax OR wane (because let's face it, interpersonal relationships with others can be confounding)....every time it happens, it's as if it's happening for the first time. It's like I have relationship amnesia.

There are those relationships where I feel connected to someone for a long time and then something happens and then one day it's just not there. I get depressed, wondering what the hell happened and if I will reconnect. Or if it's lost forever. Sometimes I wonder if I will connect with another human being as strongly as I did this person I just 'lost.' Then something strange will happen: A relationship I've had that has felt uninteresting and superficial will somehow morph into this beautiful thing, also from an abstract place I cannot comprehend. Instead of depression, a deep sense of love comes over me, almost euphoric.

Then there are others that are somewhere in between there, the most confusing of all. A particular relationship of this nature can be exhilarating, frustrating, satisfying, meaningful, twisted, seemingly fucked up in their own right, pleasantly unpredictable, unpleasantly unpredictable, and quite the paradox of normality. Yet, the minute people stop surprising me this way and evoking such emotion within me.....now THAT will be the real Twilight Zone.